NICU Day 2 full day

So, today the boys both had ultrasounds done on their brains to see if they had any brain bleeds and we are happy to announce both tests came back NEGATIVE!! These tests are done routinely so there will be more to come throughout their stay. It is very common after birth for babies to lose weight so their new weights are Maddox 3pounds 5 oz and Mason 3 pounds 3 oz.  Very normal even though it sounds like a lot.  Maddox is on CPAP and Mason is a little behind him.  The next step above CPAP is breathing in regular air, so that is a big deal!!! Very exciting. Both boys are just so darn cute and tonight daddy got some skin to skin time with Maddox and Mommy got some time with Mason <3.  Mike had the opportunity to take Maddox's temp and change his diaper which was a fail...lol. Daddy needs a little more practice. He said Maddox was lookin at him like, "seriously, dad, you can't change a diaper!?" Wish i was there to see that! Mike was telling Maddox all about the things they are going to do when they get older...skiiing, riding bikes etc. So sweet <3

Those are the updates so far for today. Stay tuned!!!

Shannon and Mike

Our little Christmas miracles have arrived!!!

I don' t even know where to start!!  As you all know this has been such a long road and I still don't believe they are here.

We knew since my cervix was dwindling it was only a matter of time and we were really really trying to exceed 32 weeks, but I guess 31 weeks 5 days will have to do.  The middle of the night Wednesday morning the nurse kept coming in to check on me and I was barely able to sleep with my contractions. This was not new to me since I was contracting every day since 26 weeks. I did notice it hurt a little more than usual, but didn't really think too much of it.  So, around 8am or so Wednesday morning I noticed a leak and then a gush and was scrambling to find my nurse call button. Honestly, I can't imagine breaking my water any where else. It was sooo much water!! and that was just one baby. What if I was in  the car? bed? recliner? How do you clean that??  lol. 

The nurses came in and I was shaking. I was in shock. Even though  I was anticipating something happening soon, I was not expecting that much! The doctor wanted to wait a few hours because there are plenty of cases of women who break their water, but either don't contract or they are able to go days, weeks with a broken water. Mike and I were laughing to ourselves because we knew a cervix of less then 1 cm and non stop contractions it was only going to escalate from here. So, we waited a couple of hours and things got more intense so he checked me and I was indeed 2cm dilated and within the hour was in the OR.  Epidural was not bad at all, but the csection itself was  so weird. You feel everything just no pain. Very odd!!  After all said and done the babies were out and screaming and i cried. The sound of their little cries were what I was dying to hear. They showed life...they showed me we got another chance. Nothing more beautiful!

When in recovery I was offered a new treatment for pain that is relatively new. It was a pain blocker they inject into your stomach on each side. I didn't ask any questions and was thinking, "well, hell, I get lovenox, heparin in the stomach must be like that." Nope!!, it's a 13 inch needle they go in with a sonogram guiding the needle. It wasn't very painful, just uncomfortable, but let me tell you I didn't feel a pain at all until like 20 hours later. If I can remember correclty it is called the Teplock Shots? I am prob very off, but in my fuzzy state thats what i THINK it's called...lol. 

Seeing the babies were the most beautiful thing and scariest. I didn't know if I wanted to just burst into tears or scream in happiness that I had two beautiful boys in this world being taken care of. Ok, I am not going to lie, I cried. We saw Maddox first and i put my finger in to touch him and when i started to talk to him he started to wimper and cry and the fact that I couldn't pick him up to console him tore me up!! I felt so helpless :( We visited Mason after that and he was nice and calm with little wimpers here and there. All I can say is I am happy they will not remember this time in their lives.  

The other most amazing and beautiful moment was seeing Mike with his boys <3. This man blows me away! He has been down there more than me bc i was having some issues with dizziness earlier and had to make sure I was stable and not going to black out so he was down their like three times already.

when he takes me down he goes over all the machines and what everything means and completely updates me all the medical jargon. With the lack of sleep I have and emotions of seeing them I couldnt tell you what machine they are hooked up to or what does what, but he is very good at breakign it down so I can understand everything at this point...lol.  He has that purell in his hand and is a nazi when it comes to making sure I purell even after i touch my shirt, face, chair etc...lol. He is so funny!  He is such a good daddy already and seeing him talk and touch the boys melts my heart so much!! <3

I have been lucky to start pumping already even though my milk has not come in. However, i am able to get a few drops here and there and they encourage bringing those little drops down just so they can give them that little bit.  Hopefully, my milk comes in soon and we can get that liquid gold :)

Ok, I am done bragging about my beautiful new family and will get off now :)  I guess this blog will just keep continuing. We blogged through infertility, pregnancy, loss, pregnancy and now will continue their stay at the nicu and then maybe I will turn this into "raising twin boys" as they get older. 

Thank you again for all of your support <3

Shannon and Mike

Update...31w4d

This morning we met with our HR doctor and like we thought, the cervix is around a 1cm.  Not really sure what is going to happen, but just waiting at this point.  We go back on Friday.  At this point, the cervix is just dwindling down and I am curious to see what Friday is going to look like if we keep going down .5cm every 3-4 days.  Contractions all weekend were the most I have had and between 2-4 min for most of the weekend. I wish I could say they weren't painful, but they def were not pleasant.  Sleeping is AWFUL! I try to start out on my left side and then extreme hip pain forces me to roll over onto my back which is very painful. I am up most of the night and having to get out of this bed by myself is a balancing act on its own.

I am trying so hard to be patient, but it is getting really rough.  I am a strong person, but between the pain of contractions every day, pressure on my cervix, lack of sleep, losing my private room permenantly and these horrible rude roomates I am at my wits end. I would do anything to be able to ride the rest of this pregnancy out at home.  Doctor said if I hold out I can go home at 34 weeks. Which is 2 weeks in a room with who knows who. I know you all are probably rolling your eyes and thinking you can do this, but the lack of sleep and constant pain and annoyance of people really puts you over the edge. 

In just four days of being with a roomate I have had to deal with projectile vomiting from her this morning and her constant sniffles and sneezing. ( I swear if I get sick bc of this girl I am going to be so pissed off!!) Last night she was on the phone til 1:30 am and her guests didn't leave until an hour after visiting hours (which is better than the other night when they left at 11:30pm) Guests who curse non stop and have no respect for others when talking. These guests were talking about how fat and ugly the nurses are and the "F" word is just flying around. What ever happened to manners? Oh and the fact that I had Chaplin Gardner here. I was so imbarrassed.  I don't understand how people can just just be so rude. 

Oh and the update on the private room. Well, i was told that the room was needed for someone with an infection and of course I would be happy to give that room to someone who was sick.  However, the person who was supposed to go in there had surgery and it corrected itself and she was sent home....so Mike and I are sitting in this room looking at my empty room for 2 days realizing no one is in there. So, our doctor comes in and tells us he did what he could, but the director is keeping one private room available in the case someone needs isolation.  Ok, I get that but the nurses even told us that it doesn't happen very often. So, we arent sure why we can't just be placed in their til someone comes in that needs it. I was in there 2 weeks before someone needed it. There is anotherprivate room but the girl who has been here for ten weeks is in there and god bless her she deserves it a whole lot more than me. 

Our doctor agreed for patients who are long term and to make them very comfortable the private room should be used for them when there isn't an isolation patient. So, I will be in my double room with a rotation of possibly sickly people and some very rude for the next 2 weeks. 

Like I said, I prob sound so miserable and ungrateful for the care I am receiving, but i promise you the nurses are fantastic. I have not come across one rude nurse thank goodness. Just rude guests...

Sorry, this is not the most uplifting blog post, but I am doing my best trying to keep sane.  

On a good note, here is a pic of Maddox from today. Mason was not cooperating :)

31 Week update with the High Risk doctor

Good morning,

This morning we saw our High Risk doctor and it seems my cervix is dwindling down :(. Monday it was a 20 and today it is a 15.  Def not what we wanted, but I knew it was going to happen because I have been having contractions all week.  That being said, I go back on Monday morning and if my cervix is down to a 1 we will have to get the rescue steroid shot.  Once the cervix is gone you have nothing left and your water will break.  Even though we are pretty sure it is not going to help much at this point, I will be put in the position where my feet are above my head :(. If it buys me a couple days or weeks we will do what we got to do :). 

On another note, i keep thinking that these boys could possibly be born on or around the same day we lost Chase and Cayden last year. The boys were born on December 22, 2012. I keep thinking...we were blessed with twins and twin boys at that and we are looking at delivering possibly near the same day those beautiful boys were brought into this world and left too soon. 

Oh on another note!!!! the roomate i have right now and only for a few more hours if that, her guests are ghetto as hell and rude rude rude!! The "F" word flying out of their mouths like crazy...and talking about the nurses and how fat and ugly they are.  I don't think this girl is over 20 years old and It is making me sick listening to their uneducated disrespectful dirty mouths!!!!!

Anyways,

thanks for reading!!!

Shannon

Truckin along...

Good morning,

Since the last post we have had some changes in treatment. We saw our High Risk doctor on Monday morning after a weekend of very little contractions. We were given a lower dose of the Indomethacin on Friday and told to take it until 6am Monday morning.  Our appointment revealed that the amniotic fluid for baby A (Mason) was fine. Still on the lower side, but not bad.  However, the Indomethacin was not compatible with Mason's heart. With Indomethacin it puts off your uterine contractions,but if used too much or too long it could be harmful to the babies heart. Typically, the Arterial Ductus in the heart is a vessel that is supposed to close once the baby is born and if the medicine is not monitored correctly it could close while in utero causing loss of blood circulation to the heart. This medicine should be taken before 31-32 weeks of pregnancy and no longer than a couple of days at a time. Mason is fine, but they could see that if taken any longer you are getting to the point where something could happen, so they took me off completely and will not be put back on. 

My cervix also went down again and i have slight funneling in the cervix...very slight. This is where things just get very unpredictable. If the procardia medication works correctly, this will relax my contractions a little bit and can hold me off. However, contractions are contractions and will do what they are supposed to do. This is where bed rest and lots of IV fluids come in to major play. The High Risk doctor even discussed being put in a position where my legs are above my head to keep the pressure off of my cervix. We tried this last night for about an hour until I started having painful contractions and couldn't take being all the way back in that position. Luckily, the Procardia kicked in and took most of the pain and contractions away.  I was told to keep an eye out for leakage of fluid, gushing of fluid and that was pretty much it.  It is still a hope and pray at this point to just go as long as i can go. 

On another note, the damn IV situation still sucks. I am needing a new Iv pretty much every two days and it makes it very hard to find areas in my hands and arms that are not still sore or bruised up.  Since we are having such problems they have resorted to bringing in Anestesiologists to do the IV's (which they are not too thrilled to do!) For some reason the Anestesiologists think they are too good to have to be coming over to Antepartum to do a nurses job. Well, I made it quite clear that i wanted the best and if they are the best than they should be happy to do it when neccessary. Sigh! Iam the one getting poked and prodded so they should stop bitching...lol. 

Friday will be 31 weeks!!! If we can just get another week in it will just be a huge milestone!!!!! I have been strict with laying on my back because Maddox is lodged in my ribs. I now know what it feels like to have bruised ribs.  As of Monday the babies are weighing an estimated 3lbs 4 oz and 3lbs 5 oz :) They are getting so big!! 

Sorry for such a long and in depth post, but I just wanted to keep everyone updated! 

Thanks for reading!!

Shannon

I will never complain again...

As I am hitting the two week mark in the hospital I am getting very ancy. I stare at walls all day while being hooked up to IV's, given 2 shots a day of blood thinners and I have seemed to have blown every vein in my arms. I am better off than some women here in the Antepartum Dept.  There is a girl across the hall who I have not seen, but have been told has been here since this summer and is also pregnant around the same time as me with twins.  She cannot get up to go to the bathroom, cannot bathe herself, has to lay constantly in a position where her legs are higher than her head. I almost cried when I was told of her situation.

Things could always be worse. I am sitting here crying because I have been here for two weeks and hate needles. At least I can get up and shower when I want and use the bathroom and I can get up and stretch my legs. I feel terrible for this poor girl, but it seems she has made the decision that she is going to do what she has to do to get her babies here safely even if that means laying practically upside down, going to the bathroom in a bed pan where people have to clean you up and give you sponge baths in bed. 

I have so much to be grateful for right now. I will deal with my two shots a day and painful IV's everyday. I will deal with an uncomfortable bed and cords and wires attached.  I will deal with not being home with my husband and dogs. I will deal with the 8 channels I have on my little tv.  There is so many things in life that can be worse. I just keep reminding myself that in around six weeks I will have two beautiful lives that I will be able to take care of outside of a bed, without needles and cords and who cares about a comfortable bed because I will be getting very little sleep to even enjoy it.  

I thank God every day that he has blessed us with not only the chance for another set of twins, but twin boys.  I never would have dreamed I would have been given a second chance to do it all over again and successfully. I thank God for a husband that loves me more than life itself and never fails to show that to me or anyone else.  I thank God for his job that has given him the necessary time off to take care of things at home and running back and forth with me. I thank God for the wonderful spouses of Fort Wadsworth that are planning a meal train starting next week to help Mike out so he doesn't have to worry about cooking for himself. I thank God for the people in my life that are keeping us afloat with thoughts and prayers. You all truly have no idea how much it means to us. We have felt every single prayer and that is what is keeping us from falling.  

Everyone has a breaking point. I am very close, but until you open your eyes and realize things could always be worse, I will make it through.  I see that beautiful light at the end of the tunnel :)

Thanks again for checking in, 

Shannon

Updated Pics of the belly!

some of you have asked for a belly shot. Please don't mind the no makeup and messy bed.  The one photo is of my one arm and it didn't show up as bad on camera than it does in person but gives you an idea of my arm :(

they say these weeks i will prob get a lot bigger. I can't imagine getting bigger, but I know it is def possible!! I swear the one pic you can see a baby outline above the monitor...lol.